Jack Willis: When you see the trauma these kids have been through, you realise how lucky you are
England’s new star tells Alex Lowe about how growing up with foster children gave him precious perspective
Alex Lowe, Deputy Rugby Correspondent
Wednesday November 25 2020, 5.00pm, The Times
Jack Willis remembers vividly the police arriving late at night to the family home in Emmer Green, on the outskirts of Reading. A teenager at the time, he was upstairs listening, aware of exactly what was happening at the front door. His parents, Jo and Steve, were being called upon to take in another foster child and give them a second chance in life.
“I would go down to say hello and you would see these poor frightened children and think, ‘How lucky have I been my whole life to have never experienced what they are going through right now?’,” Willis, the Wasps and England flanker, says. “You do whatever you can to make a difference.”
The Willis family have fostered seven children over the past decade, ranging in age from tiny babies to seven-year-olds, all of them arriving on the doorstep in need of love, protection and security. Some would stay for days, others for nearly two years before being adopted by their “for ever families” or returning home.
“Some of the things these kids have been through are incredibly traumatic. They have had such a tough start. Sometimes they are only two or three weeks old and they have already had these setbacks and started on the wrong foot, going straight into care,” Willis says.
“It is a nice thing to be able to share with them the love and affection that we had growing up from our parents, help them realise they are meant to be treated that way and set them back on the right path. That is a special thing to be a part of.”
Growing up in that environment — alongside his younger brother Tom, the Wasps No 8, and sister Annabel — has had a profound impact on Willis, shaping his character and his view of the world. The 23-year-old has been lauded to the skies recently, winning player of the year awards and his first England cap with a second in the offing against Wales on Saturday. Those who know him best — his coaches, family and friends — have no concerns about his head being turned by the adulation. It is easy now to understand why.
“[Having foster children in the house] has been absolutely brilliant for all of our children. It has made them very grounded,” Jo, Jack’s mother, says. “We didn’t have any of the teenage, ‘life’s unfair’ complaints because they have seen what unfair really is. Children have literally been brought here at 11 at night by the police. That is the tough side of life.”
Willis was 13 when his parents called a family meeting around the dining table to discuss their plan to start fostering. “My mum had always grown up working with children,” he says. “We were all dead keen and got stuck into it as a family. I absolutely loved it. It was like having an extra sibling or two around.”
When he wasn’t playing junior rugby for Reading Abbey RFC, Willis would be getting his hands dirty at home, whether throwing a ball around in the garden or at the changing table. “My mum found it entertaining that I was giving it a go with nappies but I have always tried to help out,” he says.
Rugby has always been a big part of life in the family. Willis’s rapid rise was halted in 2018 when a brutal knee injury cost him a place on England’s tour to South Africa. Having also undergone an ankle operation, there was a period when he was in a wheelchair with both legs raised. In darkly comic scenes, the only way that Steve, who was a big bear of a No 8 in his own playing days, could get his son to physiotherapy sessions was by wedging him into the boot of the car.
Willis found some solace and perspective at home. The little boy living with the family at the time also needed to do daily leg exercises and they would sit down on the floor together to complete their rehabilitation. “It was a pretty dark period when I was in the wheelchair and in the boot of the car but you have got these kids around you who are going through certain things,” Willis says. “I injured my leg playing professional sport and you realise you are lucky to even be playing professional sport, to take for granted things like having a roof over your head and three meals a day. It gives you perspective when you are in a tough place that you are not the worst off, even when your mind can start to say, ‘Why me? Why is this going on?’ ”
Willis has moved in with his partner, Megan, who teaches children with special educational needs, but he stays in close contact with the four-year-old foster child currently living with his parents. They had a chat on Sunday morning about Christmas because the little boy is getting excited. In the afternoon, the Willis brothers each scored a try as Wasps defeated Bristol Bears.
“When I go back I always make sure I try to mess around in the garden or charge around and act like a big kid, to try to make him laugh. It is always nice to see a smile back on their faces,” he says.
Willis is a hero to that boy, who has been with the family for 13 months. “He loves watching the boys on TV,” Jo says. “If Jack is at home doing his stretching then this little chap is hanging over his shoulders and trying to copy him.”
The longest any child has stayed with the family was 22 months. Seeing the children leave is a “heartbreaking” moment but the Willis family stays in touch with many of the adoption families.
On the day of their son’s England debut against Georgia, Jo and Steve were inundated with photographs of their former foster children waving England flags and holding “Good luck Jack” signs. “It is pretty special to have that bond with these kids,” Willis says.
The family’s purpose to help others will continue for another generation. Annabel, 18, has inherited her mother’s talents for working with children and Willis has decided to start volunteering for a charity called Home Start. “My mum loved working with them and I’d love to do my part to give back,” Willis says.
“There are times where the parents are fully to blame for children going into foster care. There are other times when they have given everything they possibly can but they can’t cope, maybe financially, or the parents have mental health issues or a disability. Home Start bridges that gap to prevent children going into care.”
That work can begin when the day job allows. For now, Willis is in camp with England. Competition is fierce in the back row but Willis, the best turnover-winning flanker in the Gallagher Premiership, is in contention to feature against Wales in the Autumn Nations Cup.
Eddie Jones, the head coach, likes Willis as a player and appreciates his attitude, which is half the battle. “He’s flipping tough,” Jones said. “In Australian slang we’d call him a knockabout bloke. He just gets on with it. Nothing fazes him too much.”
That is not to say Willis is not driven. As a boy, he drew up a chart for his bedroom wall featuring all the goals he wanted to achieve. “Play for England” was on that list; so too was “Make Mum and Dad proud”. “He does that every day,” his mother says.
Topic: Interview with Jack in The Times (Read 1097 times)
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